Emotinally Trained ..

Sleep Trained ..

Ever heard of the word ?? I heard it today .. In a momma's blog. Where she goes on to describe how children don't know how to put themselves to sleep. And in the first few months of childhood, he gets the clue when he/she is swayed in the arms , or stroked mildly and the likes. After a few months, u need to get him sleep trained - to let him realise when is the time to sleep and teach him to put himself to sleep.

So, this is how it is done. The child is put in the bed when its time to sleep. The lights switched off and he is left. The first day the child cries his heart out. After some time , the mommy comes and picks him up, put him down again, child cries again, momma picks again - this time after a longer time duration. It goes on this way. Finally the child gets tired and sleeps. The second day, child sleeps earlier. And this is repeated daily. Slowly the child begins to understand his sleep timings, and that no matter what, he has to sleep by himself. He has to hold himself and go to sleep. And voila ! the child is sleep trained. After some time u just need to put him in his cot and switch off the light ..

I wonder if this is the case in relationships. Do we teach each other to be emotionally trained similarly ... To the point that u just need to switch of the light and leave the room, and the other person knows that its time to stop crying and hold himself and his emotions !!

The calling ...

I found my calling -

The aim of my life is to entertain myself ...

And with this thought, I free myself of All the obligations, dos n dons and having to question my feelings n actions .. lol ..

ME ME EVERYWHERE ..

hmmm , this seems to be my blogging day.. and yes , i am NOT working et all :D .. ha ha ha ..

So, i am in a listing mood now :D ..And i will list all the things i love bout abt .. abt .. abt .. ME .. and no, i won be modest :P

So, here u go .. read it , and love me/hate me more :)

• THE crazy streak in me .. which makes me do crazy things .. lol .. sometimes stupid things too :P
• The way i can listen - without losing patience
• The "falling - everywhere" habit of mine .. though at times i have seriosuly embarassed myself bcoz of that .. haah
• The way i can change my looks .. from quite ugly, to quite pretty .. And vice-versa .. lol .. :D
• The way i feel lonely when i am lonely .. lol .. get THAT if u can :)
• The intuitions which i get about my loved ones .. and seriously , more often than not, i seem to be correct .. well , except few ppl .. some ppl , though i am very close to them, i can't read them .. as in i don get gut feelings abt them . i have to rely on their words then ..
• The way i can connect to almost everyone i want to ..
• The fact that i can still cry :)

And here are the things i hate .. no hate is a strong word .. the things i not so much like abt me ..

• ummm, the fact that I am a VERY VERY VERY closed person. Phew, i wish i was not soooo closed
• Hmmm , My sense of humor .. THAT i SERIOUSLY want to improve upon... but still, it wld have been good to have been a born comic .. hmm
• The way i get conscious of myself in a crowd
• The way i seem to compare myself with every girl i meet .. lol .. sometimes boys too .. :P
• The way how i behave sometimes depends on the other person
• The way i can NOT connect to some ppl i want to :)

Lol , this is turning out to be SO MUCH fun .. rest , later :) ..

P.S:- Why don they have the Comic Sans font .. which font listing is complete without COMIC SANS .. hmmpphh .. Anyways , i am gonna experiment with the fonts .. :)

love is like ..

i had logged off my blogger .. and i read this line somewhere, and i logged back in to just post it ..

love is like wine...u feel great initially but eventually end up with a hangover!

This is like so so so true . I mean , even if it is not a hangover , it just settles down ... That is what is the truth of love .. Not the mushy stuff of "Happily Ever After" and "Love forever stuff" .. love is just wine .. Something which just gives u a high .. a high more than alcohol ..

On the contrary, friendship is like a park - playground .. where u go and have fun , and come back .... and go back again whenever u want to .. and swing on swings .. and fall down .. and can see flowers and hear birds .. that is what is friendship .. it doesn give u a high but a happiness and sense of well- being .. friendship is just great .. :) ..

Love is great too .. Infact i believe that everyone should fall in love .. ATLEAST once .. sucessfful or unsuccessfull ... fulfilled or unfulfilled .. that is something everyone shld taste .. because never in life do we cry or laugh or feel happy the way we do when we are in love .. and thats why it is reverred so much .. But it will go away .. the high .. the trick is to build a friendship before the love goes away (sorry , the high .. actually, personally i am pretty confused over what really love is , so i prefer to say it as the "HIGH" :) )

musings .. bitter - sweet ..

Seems like so much has happened in the last couple of days. Have been through confusion, amazement, wonder, sadness, happyness , hopefullness .. everything .. don't even remember all the stuff .. Its like i am trying to figure myself out all over again .. Some random musings out of my mind ..

>> I find myself questioning "why do i blog" and "why i am hooked over blogging" over and over again .. Even though i have already written a post about it .. Is it that i don believe what i have written ?? It is that i find a respite from my loneliness here ?? But i don like to see my blog that way .. Blog is a place i luv , not a place i seek refugee.. oh , my heart , believe me .. u are not being a loser shying away from the world .. u are amazing and entertaining urself from the scores of ppl present out there on the net .. Ppl whom u might have never got a chance to meet in the real world.. every one of whom , in their own way, teaches something .. opens a window for a thought .. or just makes u laugh .. *sigh*.. Why the hell do i need to question everything ..

>> ppl die .. hmmm , sad .. how do they die .. what happens to their essence when they die .. all the thoughts in their mind .. the feelings they feel .. the ideas they have .. what happens to all of that?? .. is all of this just electric signals ?? produced by human mind .. like current which just stops flowing when u switch off the switch.. Am i too just current ?? flowing in this stupid body ?? the essence of me .. the ME which i so much fuss over .. hmmm , who knows .. its just hard to let go of the memories of those electric signals .. which never turn on again .. or do they .. like energy .. they might just change the form .. and enter a different body .. or diff bodies .. i guess i am in trance :) ..

>> Timeline is a good book .. i lost my copy somewhere .. one of the best science fictions that i have read ..

>> Some shit is happneing in India .. The nandigram rape thing .. i just don know what to say . why are things so shitty .. cummon, are we living in a democratic india or not .. economic issues aside, where is the sense of respect for the fellow being .. so much for Indianness and Indian culture .. And i feel shitty for i do no do anything but bitch about it .. and raise my hands and say .. what is happeneing .. someone do something .. what can i do .. when will things improve .. shit ... what the hell do i do .. except blog abt it .. and get angry and let my friends know .. hey look , i am an all aware girl .. and i am so morally right that i feel bad about i .. its shit ..

Most of the people, me included, can't be sure of performing any better than the ones up there are doing .. hell , we can' even solve the personal animosity withe our relatives and friends .. what the hell are we going to do when the animosities turn BIG .. Are we going to respond in a better way .. and that just brings me back o my original belief that humans are basically animal .. the animal instincts are all in there .. restrained by so called social norms and rules .. and comes out on the first occasion it can ..

And to think about it, no matter how inhuman Dr. Letcher is (of the "Silence of the lambs" fame, but u need to read "hannibal the cannibal" and "The Red Dragon" to know him more..) , he is actually correct .. and if the so called social norms and social fears are erased out of human mind, ppl are gonna turn ino hannibals .. living for their pleasure .. and their pleasure alone .. this is the law of nature .. waise , in some ways , i actually like Dr.Letcher

>> Indian Cricket .. a perect example of how we destroy something we love .. :)

>> I am going a lil bit into "waiting for the call" mode again .. lol .. its not too much right now though .. and errr, i'm kinna surprised by myself :) ... haah , but its fun ..

>> and well, i promised to tell about my new found bloggers .. not feeling much upto it .. but here u go ..

1) An american family - a soooo american family .. and a peek into their lives .. havn been much INTO it .. but its sweet ..

2)An american girl cabbie .. - Nice experiences .. good to know of a life which is sooooo different than ours .. havn read much of it though .. but am planning to ..

4) and here is someone i found today - looked decent on the first go .. will have to explore more to form any opinion but :)

and abt the book - Mystic river is ok .. a decent thriller mystery .. liked some parts of it quite .. also the bend and gray shades in the character .. planning to watch the movie too .. if its in IMDB top 100, it has to have something in it :)

But i am going to devote my one WHOLE post to shantaraam :)

When memories fail ..

Memories .. Memory ... How co-related they are, and yet mean so different. :) .. when memories fail , its physical .. but when memories fail, its ummm .. more of "spiritual" .. or ... "life-ual"..

I have had a bout of this "memories failure" recently.

For the three years spent in this city, my best friend and i have virtually lived together. Spending all the weekends together, talking hours on phone, tracking each and every detail of the each other's life. Fighting like cats n dogs. Someime like grown ups (lol !! ) and now we are going to go our seperate ways . as in we won be living in the same city together. And its going to be different. So, today he was just telling me about his other best friend whom he has been wanting to see very much. And i just suddenly though - Will he miss me like that when we are not together? And for a moment i tried to think of our past, of the memories, and ... i failed .. And i skipped a beat ..

Well, i refound the memories later (lol) .. but it got me thinking .. how we get so busy in doing things , fixing things , mending things , organising things that we forget to look at things and enjoy things .. :) ..

maybe somehow it is good .. Maybe it means that u live in the moment .. and then let go. .. but doesn it also means that the moments were too easy for u to let go .. that they were not imp enuff to hold on .. and i suddenly realised, how i remember much more "small events" of childhood than of the last few years .. Hmmm .. maybe when u get too busy trying to put the big blocks of ur life in correct places, u tend to forget the fun of swinging in the swings .. :) .. or maybe it just depends on how u are solving the puzzle :)..

khair , i guess i have had enuff dose of this kinna "life" stuff .. Now for something fun .. I just realised that the short form of both "best friend" and "boy-friend" is bf .. lol .. so i can't shorten my best friend to call him bf .. coz it wld give a diff meaning u see :) .. and .. ummm , and , well nothing interesting filhaal .. so, thats that ...

p.s: - i had some other things in my mind too .. but then i am too tired of thinking of them to type it here :) .. waise, i found few other fun bloggers .. so, its is fun rite now :)

similarities between Rani Mukerjee and Me ...

haha .. i got a real HIGH as i was starting to write this blog. I told my friend of the subject and he was like"Rani Mukerjeee nooooooo ... . U can compare urself to a much better person". lol... Imagine .. someone ranking me better than Rani Muherjee .. ok, RANI MUKERJEE .. he he .. yeah, yeah, yeah , i know this owes more to his dislike towards Rani than his liking towards me. But what the hell. Chane ke jhaad pe chadhne mein kya jaata hai ..:P

Khair, continuing with the post. The similarities are not the physical smilraities (though we are similar that way too. We are both short, dark and fat .. he he .. Ok, now she is not fat, but she was .. ) .. those are the personal ones.. I saw that episode of Koffee with Karan with rani, kajol and Shahrukh, and I noticed that she was a lot similar to me. So, here u go ..

>> She talks less, is never sure of what to say and what to do .. :P .. is easy to confuse.. soooooo, just like me ( me giving a bow .. he he)

>> She lacks sense of humor ..As in she can't be very witty, like Kajol is ... :((( .. ba ho ho ho .. yeah, just like me .. i wish i was writing a post about my similarities wih Kajol, but .........:((( ...

>>Her mind doesn work very fast. She will never win into a rapid fire question round (and hence the koffee hamper :) ). I also share the same fate :(( .. I can come with amazing (ok not amazing, but atleast decent) answers AFTER the rapid fire, but during , the rapid fire just fires me. Thats why i can never be good on stage ... hmmmppphhh.. khair, ask rani, she wld also give u the same answer. That she doesn like rapidly fired questions .. :P

>> She is conscious of herself. Make it very conscious. I know its unbelievable, considering that she is a movie star. But i still know that she is. I know u don believe me. So, u can go away .. :P And yes, so am i . VERY. :)

>> She gets more conscious with ppl she is not comfortable with. And it gets just soooo evident .. (Yes, i am referring to Kajol). And it makes her silent. I saw her other interviews to get my theory confirmed and she is not like what she is in front of Kajol. She is not very talkative yes, but NOT as silent.In her previous koffee with kareena kapoor, she was all bubbly. And the difference just shows. The answers she gives, the way she responds. It just shows.

>> hmmm , now for a good similarity. She can come up with very stupid logics and get away with it. he he he . As she did in KBC. Chosing salman bcoz salman was lucky for Preity and look, she got away with it too. :D .. Sadly, my bad logics don work very good. But i give bad logics, yes very bad logics. i do.

>> What ?? the similarities has ended .. so fast ... oh no .. and I thought we are SOOOOO similar ..

koi nahin, i'm going to watch more of her interviews and find out more similarities between ourselves.. hmmmppphhh ...